Your Rational World is a Circle Jerk
Tonight, a special report on one of the most fascinating mysteries of this century:
The case of a bucolic New England town that is one day beset by a broadcast of horror and hilarity utterly beyond the comprehension of the profane. When the transmissions suddenly ceased, experts claim that the residents of Candle Cove were inflicted with a collective chronic epididymal hypertension.
Will they ever find release?
This special report is the tale of...
You know what time it is kiddies, put on some Richard Wagner, pack another TIGHT LITTLE bowl, it's time to BLAZE IT and RAISE IT for Episode 11 of TALES FROM THE TROUGH! Did you really think we would miss the most important day of the year?! FOOL of a THULE, we wouldn't wanna be anywhere else... except if you found a place with a comfy beanbag chair and an unlimited supply of Doritos, Big Macs and wild berry Skittles... mmmmm.... sweet H-tler I am so fucking high right now lmao!
Tonight's Shivaratrian Shanties:
- True Shitposters
- Unsolved Pissteries
- The Adventures of Little Hitora-chan
You there! Where's your shame? Put down that Jack 'o Lantern and pick the candy corn off your pecker. Tonight is the Holiest of nights! Tonight the hallowed halls of the Oven-realm are the closest to our cold and dismal plain. Can you hear them? They're all around us? They're here!!!
Ohhhh the ritual must have been a success, as the Ovenmen are pleased with our sacrifices! Here kiddies, is THREE HOURS of tricks, treats and traps! Turn off the lights, put your head phones on and dive into the auditory nightmare of TALES FROM THE TROUGH!
Tonight's hallowed heresies:
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The Ovenmen are hemorrhoidaly humbled to present to you, our diverse delegation of distinguished dunny-divers, with yet another gonorreian grab-bag of gangrenous gallows-gags. Check your tucks! Strap in your pinksleeves! Gird your loins for a trailblazing testament of Tales from the Trough!