The Daily Shoah! Episode 5: Labor All Day

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In this week’s Daily Shoah we present our Labor All Day Commie spectacular. The Death Panel takes on the Red Scare… or adds to it, depending on your particular worldview (all of which are totes valid and important). Morrakiu returns with another installment of the freshly renamed “Merchant Minute!”

mccarthy-warned-you

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The Daily Shoah! Episode 3: Summer Chimpout Edition

Daily-Shoah

 

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In this week’s Daily Shoah we have an emergency Death Panel session to discuss the recent events in Ferguson, Missouri followed by this weeks JQ minute by our pal Morriaku.

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Dindu Nuffins Murdered by Racist Ferguson Cops

On Saturday, August 9th, promising young black activist Michael Brown was ruthlessly assassinated by a white supremacist Ferguson policeman as the officer drove to his monthly Klan rally. According to reports, Brown was sitting on a park bench reading Michael Foucault’s “Discipline and Punish” to a group of street orphans when the cop parked alongside the curb, shouted “Niggers ain’t supposed to be readin’ boy!” and fatally shot Brown as he vainly attempted to shield himself from the deadly hail of gunfire behind his Noam Chomsky filled bookbag. As the youth lay gasping for breath, his last words were “Weep not for me, but for the future of our people.”

The black community of Ferguson, long held captive under the boot-heels of the all white Ku Klux Law Enforcement Brigade, finally rallied to action, ousted the vile racists, and took back their city. The police chief was revealed to be a Grand Dragon on national television, and was killed by a single shot from actor Jamie Foxx’s .45 caliber handgun while attempting to escape to his private helicopter pad with a black female hostage.

This is for Dindu, cracker.
This is for Dindu, cracka!

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Smiling White Racists Invent Hateapp

Recently ValleyWag exposed a pair of dastardly white racists who invented a GPS based application designed to highlight and cross compare local stores supplying matches, gasoline, 2x4s, and sturdy rope while simultaneously plotting efficient routes to the closest black churches in the area. Also included is free uploading to Stormfront.org of any successful lynching or boot-party, along with the option to tag all of your Klan buddies anonymously. Just kidding, what is actually being attempted here is far, far worse.

The smiling faces of evil.
The smiling faces of evil.

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A Fat Queer Clumsily Wields Tactical Nihilism

Recently Black Girl Dangerous, the ultimate proving ground for un-ironic post-modernist identity politics, featured an article by a “fat brown goddess” wistfully complaining that The Great White Cultural Leviathan had “colonized” everyone’s perceptions of love and beauty. Like most BGD posts, Caleb Luna’s article is a veritable gold mine for those of us suffering from a morbid fascination with the latest antics of the Social Justice Community. The sad tale begins with an immediate blame-shift phrased like a catechism in the opening sentence:

“Falling in love is dangerous for brown boys because, under white supremacy, we are not people to love.”

I think there's a much simpler explanation here.
I think there’s a much more obvious explanation here.

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The Truth is Out There: Paranoid Liberal Conspiracy Theories

For a group that tries to make rational objectivity and scientific evaluation part of their very identity, you would think liberals would be somewhat immunized from credulously plunging into popular myths and downright paranoid conspiracy theories. Apparently believing yourself to be intellectually superior to the average bear actually makes one more prone to errors in reasoning. Here are a few hilariously blatant pieces of fiction that have become points of faith for the progressive Democrat crowd.

Oligarchyvs1

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Cathy Reisenwitz is the new Rebecca Watson.

I’ve predicted for a while now that it’s only a matter of time before Cathy Reisenwitz, eager eyed young feminist and rent-seeker extraordinaire, finally achieves her life long ambition of being paid to speak at a conference of neckbearded libertarian social outcasts only to be clumsily hit on by one of the smellier basement dwellers while riding an elevator. This will allow her to realize her ultimate end game of ranting about patriarchal oppression at the hands of the male dominated libertarian community and kick off an ideological civil war inside of the liberty movement, eventually spawning Libertarian + with Reisenwitz ascending to the throne as their chief representative.

Resistance is futile.
Resistance is futile.

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Celebrating Diversity: Liberal Tolerance and the “Religion of Peace”

I’ve long maintained that you can predict most liberal positions will just be the opposite of whatever conservatives are talking about at the moment. This is certainly the case any time some progressive smirks and proclaims that Islam is totally no different whatsoever than Christianity in terms of social consequence. Even the New Atheists, a group notorious for misadventures in philosophy, are at least intellectually honest enough to loudly disagree with the liberals on their naive premise that Islam is “no more problematic than Christianity” and cite plenty of convincing reasons for why this isn’t true. Quite naturally, the liberals considered the intellectual case for disapproving of Islam at considerable length, and then constructed a carefully reasoned rebuttal of this premise. Just kidding! They did nothing but scream “Islamophobia” at full volume, peppering retorts of “Not All Muslims Are Like That” in between mandatory accusations of xenophobia and racism.

Pro-tip, excluding extremists is common sense, not intolerance.
Protip: Excluding extremists is common sense, not intolerance.

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Alex’s Definitive Guide to the Gun Control Debate

I have been dragged through this debate so many times that the talking points have been ingrained into my neural pathways like the well worn action of Grandpa’s old Remington shotgun. For the record, I am pro-gun, but for infinitely simpler reasons than the typical pundit: I just like guns. To put this in liberalspeak, if two consenting gay adults wanna use a loaded AR-15 as a sex toy, that’s their business, and you religious bigots had better keep your intolerant noses out of their bedroom. The only thing they’re hurting is their alimentary canals and possibly the muzzlebrake on that Colt. Of course, to be fair, both pro-gun and gun control advocates make some predictably stupid points in this discussion, so let’s lock and load the primary examples of bad premises and shoddy thinking:

Do it faggot.

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Stereotype Threat: A “God of the Gaps” for Liberals

Being one of the only atheists in existence to actually spend time examining theistic arguments instead of just posting Christopher Hitchens memes, I’ve been reading Edward Feser‘s The Last Superstitution: A Refutation of the New Atheism, a book I firmly recommend to anyone interested in either Thomas Aquinas’s metaphysics or seeing Richard Dawkins get some much deserved intellectual ridicule. One of the concepts addressed is the New Atheist tendency to fixate on facile and easily dismantled arguments since the philosophical nuance required for attacking the more esoteric and complex variety eludes their feeble understanding.

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