Trump is Batman

Des Moines, Iowa — CNN reports that Donald Trump, the tower-dwelling urbanite from New York, has revealed that he is in fact Batman:

The Bowman family had driven from the western suburbs to see Trump and his helicopter. Neither David nor Sarah Bowman had resolved to vote for Trump, at least not yet, but they had four little boys, and this chance was too good to miss.

Into the helicopter went William, 9; Sean, 6; Brendan, 5; and Henry, who just turned 3. Their mother went with them. Henry got scared just before takeoff and left the aircraft to be with his father. The other boys remained. William brought a GoPro camera to capture the experience; a clip later wound up on Facebook.

"Mr. Trump," he said, aiming the camera at his benefactor.

"Yes," Trump said, pulling on the lapels of his jacket.

"Are you Batman?" the boy asked.

"I am Batman," Trump said.

The helicopter roared to life, causing another windstorm, hurling more dust at the people outside. William looked out the window, marveling at the power of the machine.

Well, that settles it. Effective immediately, we have to stop baneposting about Donald Trump. He isn't the villain that the media wants us to have. He's the hero America deserves, but not the one it needs right now. So we'll hunt him. Because he can take it. Because he's not our hero. He's a silent guardian, a watchful protector. A shitlord.

Also published at Atlantic Centurion

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Another voice on the Alt-Right and a White nationalist. Macroaggression Consultant at Bagelbaum & Associates LLC. Like my effortposting? Gib e-shekels: 14HZJbFs3YL5oXVnxFpduXv5G3uqP85xoC
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