The Super Bowl, Buttercucks and SWPL-Cola

So, something of political importance happened in America during yesterday’s sportball event. I know, because within 24 hours my feed has been inundated with boycott petitions and appeals to the bandwagon fallacy.

I know I know, they’re being ridiculous. It’s only a ball game. They are being totally extreme and it was only a commercial or some commercials. This kind of reaction totally reflects their horrible politics and validates everything you laugh about on Jon Stewart’s show. Coincidentally, have you considered killing yourself?

The Super Bowl is the mecca of western commercialism and consumerism. Paying millions of dollars per minute, reaching an audience of over 100 million, companies gather the best and brightest in the field of advertising.

Of course, modern propaganda has evolved quite a bit since Bernays and his “freedom torches.” It has evolved to serve its devolving consumer base.

Recognizing that materialism has destroyed ideal, that as a result the public has regressed to walking alimentary canals, advertising has shifted from representational to aspirational. Realizing that there is no longer anything worth dying for, the schtick is now about showing you something is worth living for. Living people can consume the product.

Watching the Super Bowl, you are being shown the best aspirational sales pitches money can buy. And you were shown… What?

cuck
Don’t lay a finger on me, buddy. I’m trying to fuck your wife.
Peanut butter and Chocolate are at marriage counseling. The wife, Chocolate, wants something new. She’s bored.  She’s empowered.  He’s enfeebled. So Butterfinger, a male, is introduced and gets between them. Butterfinger then starts making moves on the wife and ignores the husband.

I know what you’re thinking. At least he’s not black. At least he’s ugly. At least the cuckold is ridiculously weak and doltish. She seems like a bitch. They probably deserve this. It’s all so very silly. Seriously, who but Republicans could find this offensive? I agree with you, It’s safe. Like a pillow. Pressed against your face.

I wager that at this rate, “monogamy rights activism” will be something social network comedians make fun of for being fedora-ish by 2018. I wonder how many Catholic school children will protest when their beloved polygamist teacher is expelled? Just kidding, I don’t wonder.

Let’s move on.

dildos
#AmericaisDildos
Pretty images. “America the Beautiful” sung by pretty voices. In different languages.  The Coke jingle at the end. Good feels, end scene. It was patriotic and very progressive. Except it was more about progress and patriotism is for racists, anyway.

Most of the post-Super Bowl kerfuffle revolves around this commercial. Probably because some residual idealism still remains when it comes to the nation our grandparents killed and died for.

Yes yes, I know. I’m sounding like the boycott petitioners. This really is a pretty commercial, the voices are pleasant, the images are moving. All these people coming together. To sell a carbonated beverage. It really shows that there are a plethora of different cultures and that they’re beautiful when selling you something that tastes like burnt corn and licorice.

But where is the American culture?

What is triggering is to realize that for many, Coke is the closest many Americans come to a national identity.  Seeing other cultures is their culture.

I would say there is merit to the conspiracies regarding Cultural Marxism, illuminati one world government, etc…  Except that international revolution and global government would require an overarching identity. Something more idealized and meaningful than a Coke commercial from the Tower of Babel.

The aspiration here is a post-national, post-cultural identity. The American melting pot has been replaced with Super Bowl commercials. The new social paradigm is anti-socialism, consumerist alienation as assimilation.

Judging by voting trends, the natives are embracing this perverse inverted-Imperialism. The immigrants seem to be warming up to it as well.

assimilation@TheMuslimGuy hits the nail on the head, here; with liberalism, the truth is what is most vapid.

Multiculturalism can only work if it’s population are as disposable as the branded consumer goods they consume.  Multiculturalism is about everyone being aliens and no one identifying with a land or people or history.

The enlightened contrarian will attempt to say I am being alarmist here, that it was just a sports event and nothing more. I tell you that he’s right and that’s the point.

Of course it was only a bad game. Of course they were only some silly commercials. Why should it be anything more? There is no need for parades or grandiose speeches or beer hall putsches anymore. The Super Bowl commercials made little effort to try and sell something, they didn’t have to. Neither did anyone try to convince or challenge, they didn’t have to. They didn’t hide their agenda, they spent millions of dollars to display it as triumphantly as possible.

They do this because they know what you’re going to buy, what you’re going to vote for, what you’re going to believe. The tone of these commercials were celebratory.

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Bulbasaur is a blue collar worker and part-time polemicist from the Southern U.S.