Touched By A SWPL

12:00 PM, 9/4/2013

I’m sitting inside Smyrna TN’s Chic-Fil-A, enjoying my spicy Protestantism with a side of waffle fries and a drink.

A White woman walks in, carrying a dark Black baby for all to see. She notices her friend almost immediately upon entering, but spends a considerable time in front of the entrance. She is very obviously checking so every person in the restaurant notices what she is carrying, that her bravery has been duly-noted. Her blonde friend is seated at a table next to mine.

Miss Brave (no ring on her finger) walks over to her friend’s table; Blonde offers her a seat, Brave declines. They chat amiably, the conversation is mostly drowned out by the lunch rush.

Suddenly Brave’s child begins loudly crying, as infants are prone to do. Brave Woman responds by doing some weird, over-dramatized shush motion with her hand.  It is almost as if she’s giving communion.

The child is silenced, and Blonde makes an amazed sound. Brave chuckles, then looks around to make sure the restaurant notices.

Brave leaves shortly after, presumably to spread the gospel of SWPL Supremacy. She of course stops to speak with the only other Black in the restaurant, a fat female cashier. She does not order anything.

I go back to work.

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Bulbasaur is a blue collar worker and part-time polemicist from the Southern U.S.